With days - and evenings - getting warmer, I feel myself drawn to restaurant terraces and street cafés - not that they can exactly be found in abundance in Japan, mind you!
Since my other half is away for a few days and the weather is absolutely glorious at the moment, last night I decided to stroll to the nearby shopping area and have dinner at our favourite Italian-Spanish restaurant, the only one left within walking distance that offers outdoor dining.
There used to be another option, a Spanish restaurant aptly called 'Mallorca', until they recently turned their lovely terrace (even with heating in the colder months) into a so-called 'open space', allowing folks to sit at a table and consume their own food or drinks that they have brought with them. Sadly, there is no service on the terrace anymore. I don't know what made them take this unfortunate decision. Perhaps it's a staffing issue - a problem increasingly prevalent in this country with an aging population, dwindling workforce and limited immigration.
At the nearby department store, there also used to be a very nice tea room with outdoor seating in a tucked-away area on the roof, surrounded by lots of greenery. But as I came to realise a few weeks ago, the tea room was moved to the basement (of all places!), leaving the former location vacant.
So, it's fair to say that opportunities to have a meal or even a drink outdoors are few and far between in this country, making the experience even more precious at the places that do exist.
While I was enjoying my dinner with a glass of wine and watching the passers-by last night, I also noticed that the gaze of many fell onto me. And it made me wonder:
Was it because I'm a foreigner? 🤔
Because I was eating outside? 🤔
Or because I was eating by myself? 🤔
Or because I'm a foreigner, eating outside and by myself? 🤔🤔🤔
Let's unpack this.
The foreign element
Living in a country with a foreign population of little over 2% automatically means that I'm in a minority. Even in Tokyo, where the ratio is higher. No matter how fluent my Japanese, my face will always give the game away that I'm obviously not Japanese. So I tend to attract the attention of people. Perhaps not as much as 28 years ago, when I first arrived here and felt like an alien every step of the way. Things have changed somewhat, but not that dramatically either.
I believe it's mainly due to curiosity. People here take a keen interest in other countries and cultures, and they are probably wondering where I'm from. Potentially a lot of interesting exchanges to be had, were it not for most people's hesitancy to strike up a conversation with a stranger. And if that stranger happens to be a foreigner, there is always the risk of the language barrier, so it probably feels safer to stay clear, even in situations that would actually lend themselves to small talk. I find that Japanese people are generally not very good at that. Like the Swiss. 😉
As a child I was taught not to stare because it's considered rude. Japanese politeness also dictates that you should not stare. So people usually don't. In fact, people here tend to avoid eye contact altogether, as it is considered impolite or disrespectful. Meanwhile I'm an avid observer of people's faces, and on occasion our gazes unintentionally meet, which I often find amusing, because their instant reaction is then to usually quickly look away, having been 'caught in the act'...
Outdoor eating
There is a distinct difference in culture between Japan and Switzerland when it comes to eating outdoors.
Street cafés and al fresco dining have always been part of the Swiss culture (or at least for as far back as I remember). Given that the Swiss climate (at least north of the Alps) wouldn't seem to lend itself to outdoor dining, unlike places with a milder climate such as Italy, that may seem surprising. And during the cold winter months, nobody in their right mind would consider having a meal in the open air. Unless you're on the ski slopes on a sunny day, where huge wooden terraces invite you to have a meal or a drink while enjoying the beautiful mountain scenery and the warm rays of the sun.
But as soon as temperatures rise in spring, you will see restaurateurs hurrying to put tables and chairs out on the terrace, and guests will instantly flock to those areas, preferring to eat out in the fresh air. And there is a good reason for that, because it is in fact scientifically proven that food tastes better outdoors. Go on, google it, and you will see!
For some reason, though, the street café and outdoor culture has never caught on in Japan, probably due to a variety of reasons.
One is that especially women here avoid direct exposure to sunlight, because fair skin is regarded as more beautiful than tanned skin. Hence the seas of parasols on sunny days, carried by women walking in the streets. One could argue that restaurants and cafés could install awnings or put up those large parasols widely seen in Europe. But for some reason, that is not nearly as common here, so even if you do find outdoor seating, you may well find yourself directly exposed to the sun.
Which brings me to the next point: Climate. Summers in large parts of Japan are long, blisteringly hot and humid, so people will seek refuge in air-conditions spaces (except me: I will always prefer outdoor seating to air-conditioned indoor areas). The brutal summer is preceded by the rainy season and followed by the typhoon season. You certainly wouldn't want to sit on a garden terrace during a typhoon, that much I can agree to. And winters - although mild in Tokyo and to the west - simply don't lend themselves to outdoor seating. So plenty of 'excuses' for restaurant owners not to provide outdoor spaces, even though there would still be plenty of periods in the year offering perfect conditions. Like now, for instance.
But then I guess it's somehow just not part of the Japanese DNA or conventional social etiquette, which dictates that dining/eating is supposedly something that is done 'privately' without the general public watching (whereby other diners in a restaurant don't count). The notable exception being picnics, especially for cherry blossom viewing parties. Contrasts and contradictions are never far away in Japan...
Eating alone
And then there is the topic of eating out by oneself, which seems to have the connotation of being boring and lonely, and with solo diners even deserving pity for not having any company to share their meal with.
There was a time when I tried to avoid dining out by myself, as I didn't find it particularly enjoyable, for instance when on business trips, or when visiting family in Europe without my wife accompanying me. And on those occasions where she went out with friends, or where she was away for a few days, I would either go to a fast food outlet or have a TV dinner at home, the purpose of it being that it was quick, cheap and served its basic purpose - being that of getting me fed.
But that changed a few years ago, when I discovered that one can very well enjoy a restaurant dinner even without any company. In fact, these days I seek out those opportunities from time to time.
Dining out by myself is a form of self-care, a way to derive satisfaction from the experience - the ambience, the flavours of the food, the chatter around me. Without a dining companion to entertain, I can sit with my thoughts, watch the world around me, or eavesdrop on fellow diners, which can be fun in itself.
When I travel solo these days, I make it a point to choose the same kind of restaurant that I would go to when together with my wife, to order a starter with a glass of bubbly, then a glass of wine with the main course. I savour the food and enjoy the moment.
And when in Europe, I usually feel treated the same way as all the other guests. Because that's what I am: A paying guest, who wants to enjoy a good meal in a nice atmosphere.
In Japan, the concept of eating out alone seems less accepted. Much of the time, when you turn up at a restaurant by yourself, you're getting the 'counter treatment'. Unlike restaurants in Europe, most establishments in Japan have a counter. I don't mean pubs or bars, but proper eateries. And the assumption seems to be that guests that turn up without a companion are happy enough to get a seat at the counter. Because why would they want a table just for themselves - and take up valuable space in the restaurant?
I don't want to be relegated to the counter, just because I'm by myself. When I'm offered a seat at the counter - which I always reject - and the staff are unwilling to accommodate me at a regular table, I will leave and try to find someplace else.
In restaurants where I'm a regular and they know my preference, I'm usually granted the 'privilege' of eating at a table alongside other diners with company, but even in those places it can be challenging, for example when I turn up during busy hours.
So when I'm sitting at an outdoor table, and people passing by glance in my direction, it's hard to know what they may be thinking. Feeling curious about the foreigner eating all by himself? Or feeling pity that I don't have company for my meal? Are they thinking how enjoyable it looks to sit there having a meal al fresco, wishing they would have time to do the same? Or are they wondering how anyone could possibly enjoy a meal on such public display? Or admiring the fact that I'm seemingly enjoying it despite being by myself? Or thinking to themselves how delicious the food looks?
I'll never know, but deep inside me, I'm hoping that at least one or the other passers-by is thinking what a great idea it is to have dinner at an outside table, and not to be deterred by eating solo, and perhaps deciding to try it by themselves sometime.
And just perhaps, some of the folks passing by last night may have been a teeny bit envious of my starter, which not only looked delicious, but also tasted absolutely devine. As did the pizza afterwards!
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